Stop asking for permission

We live in a permission-based society. Ever since we were young, we’ve been conditioned to ask for permission.

Permission to go to the bathroom. Permission to speak. Permission to go play with the neighbor kids. Permission to get a driver’s license. Permission to major in the college subject we desire. Permission to take vacation. Permission to come into the office late.

Permission to … well, you get the idea. 

It’s no surprise, then, that even when we get to adulthood, we’re conditioned to feel like we need to ask permission to live the lifestyle we desire.

Take, for example, my former client, Brian. He joined one of my group courses because he said he needed to find his life purpose. He was not entirely happy with his career, he was on his second marriage, and he said he couldn’t shake the feeling that he was “destined for more.”

He signed up for my course, did some of the early calls, but then got stymied when I asked four simple questions: 

  • What do you like to do? 
  • What do you love to do? 
  • What do you hate to do? 
  • If you had a magic wand and could magically transport yourself into your desired lifestyle, what would it look like?

Not only had Brian never even considered those questions, he honestly felt he needed permission to even consider answering them. He was so trapped in the prison of his permission mindset that he was simply unable to define his desired lifestyle, much less live it.

Brian’s story is one I’ve seen time and again. And it’s one that exemplifies how my life used to be.

I once thought I needed permission to live the life I wanted. Permission from whom? I have no idea. And that’s the point. The only person you need permission from to start living a life of freedom and fulfillment is … yourself.

Forget the expectations of others. Forget your past. Forget your bad habits. Give yourself permission to define and live the lifestyle you want.


The above excerpt is from my new book, Five Pillars of the Freedom Lifestyle, available 9.24.19. Receive Chapter One in your inbox for free by clicking here.

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